Thursday, June 16, 2011

#RomanceKills, Romance Novel Addiction

Lauren Dane, Inside Out
The Romance Novel Author and Reader world has been buzzing with the news of a book about Romance Novel Addiction entitled Finding the Hero in Your Husband by Dr. Juli Slattery. An article on the controversy can be found here.

At first glance, the title of the book sounds pretty good. Finding the Hero in Your Husband. I'm thinking, "Okay, that sounds like something every wife should try to do." But ultimately the book blames marriage problems on "Romance Novel Addiction" and advises everyone to stop reading them immediately.

My first thought was that this whole idea of romance novel addiction is total BS. But honestly, people can become addicted to ANYTHING. It's not that particular thing's fault for existing.

I once knew a girl who was completely addicted to cleaning her ears with Q-Tips. Took them with her everywhere she went. I found her in the parking lot outside of my house once with a Q-Tip in her ear and a handful of them spread across the hood of her car.

Should we ban Q-Tips for everyone? Advise that no one use them lest they become addicted? Obviously, no.

Here's my advice. If your children go hungry and your home is so filthy it could be found a health risk all because you have your nose stuck in an ultra-erotic romance novel for 20 hrs a day, go find some help.

The same applies if you have five months of laundry piled in a mountain next to the washer and dishes overflowing your sink into the bathtub because you're posting on Facebook and Twitter fifty times a day. I don't give a shit what you ate for breakfast. Stop posting updates and go clean something. Get some help.

If you read romance novels, even if you read three a week, and you still find time to sleep, eat, and make your children smile, you are doing just fine.

As long as you are still a clean, productive, non-violent member of society, go ahead on with that Q-Tip fetish, that annoying Facebook habit, hell, let's go crazy and say pick-up a couple lotto tickets and bite your fingernails too.

In closing, Romance Novels DON'T kill. Ignorance does.