Thursday, July 28, 2011

Elaina's Got A Gun


Below is a scene from Surprisingly Supernatural in which Elaina argues with a friend over the "proper" way to handle a problem. 

    “So, what do you want to do?” Elaina was already pushing bras aside in the top drawer of her dresser in search of her gun.
     “I don’t think this will help. Or maybe it will…” Ellis held up a dainty black thong from the tip of his index finger.
     Elaina snatched the article of clothing from his hand and thrust it into the drawer. She nearly took his finger off by slamming the drawer shut as he reached for a lacy pink bra. Waving the gun around near his face like a novice, she backed him out of her bedroom. She knew for a fact there weren’t any bullets in the gun but the wary look on his face was worth the embarrassment of him thinking her unskilled with the weapon.
     “Let me grab some bullets and we’ll go.”
     “We can’t just bust down the door, guns a blazin’, and threaten to shoot Camilla. You can’t even take a gun through the portal.”
     “Can’t or shouldn’t? That’s a very important distinction.”
     Elaina dug through the spice cabinet until she came to the large tin labeled “Black Pepper”. She popped the top and proceeded to topple bullets into the palm of her hand. Today she wasn’t feeling the least bit concerned about concealing her weapon so she’d chosen her Walther 9mm, which she had no concealable holster for. After dropping what looked close to the right amount of ammo in her palm, she huffed out a breath, ignoring whatever Emile was trying valiantly to argue with her about.
     She started back towards her bedroom, she’d forgotten the clip. I hope no one decides to break into my house now that I’ve got the Donish swarm living here. In an effort to Pixie-proof her weapons collection, she’d scattered parts around the house in the least likely places for the Pixies to get into. Pixies hated pepper. Wouldn’t get within a foot of the stuff. They’d already been threatened with de-winging if they used her clothing as fabric again. Seeing Don in that shiny satin tunic, wearing the Victoria’s Secret tag as a belt, had nearly been her breaking point.
     “Shush,” she told Emile, stopping his lecture mid-sentence.
     “Did you just ‘shush’ me?” He looked at Don, the Pixie now alighted on Emile’s shoulder. “I think she did. She shushed me.”
     Elaina opened the cabinet under the sink in the bathroom and pulled out her box of tampons. She recovered the clip and returned the box to the sink. Purposefully, she strode back to the kitchen and lined her gun, clip, and pile of ammo up on the table. When she heard a throat clear, she looked up to find Emile and Don with identical looks of amusement on their faces.
     “You are not going to shoot Camilla.”
     “She poisoned Ellis. She’s probably turned him into some crazy sex slave by now and you’re telling me I’m not allowed to shoot her?”
     Both men shook their heads.
   “Fine.” Elaina stood and crossed the room, retrieving the pepper container and carefully reloading the bullets she’d withdrew earlier. Holding the 9mm up for inspection, she asked, “Can I at least hit her? I won’t even take any bullets. Just let me hit her with it once.”
     Emile laughed so hard he bent double, which wasn’t good considering he’d turned his back on her and that lovely skirt of his was climbing dangerously high.
     “Why’re you laughing? You’re the one wearing a skirt.”
     He straightened, wiping his eyes. “It’s a kilt.”
     Back to rubbing her temples. “Emile, why are you wearing a kilt and what exactly do you expect me to do to help Ellis if I’m not even allowed to hit the stupid bitch?”
     His eyes widened for just a moment at Elaina’s language. Gwaedonaire (the Pixie otherwise known as "Don") took a step closer to Emile’s neck, attempting to hide behind his hair.
    “We drew straws. I lost. Now I have to patrol the Highlands Festival in the park this evening. I’m supposed to be blending in.”
     “Well, I’d lose the Nirvana T-Shirt if I were you. It kills the whole outfit.”
     “I’ll take your thoughtful advice into consideration. Are we done discussing my skirt?”
     “I thought it was a kilt.”
     “Where is the summoning spell Ellis gave you?”